2008 Woodie Awards
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G.M.Bluth and Maeby Funke
Issue date: 3/18/08 Section: Opinion
Thumbs Up
Going All Night
Even with fours years of experience we were yet again surprised after seeing the rather significant chunk of the Loyola student body who turned out for Relay for Life that nothing was on tap. Instead, the draws of Relay 2008 included melodious offerings by campus talents (where do these wonderful warblers come from? Must be something in the Aquafina), a gut-busting improv show and hourly influxes of free food. So even though Relay had to go up against York Road and St. Patrick's Day this year, cancer took a $150,000 dive -- that's quite a lot of medical supplies or one Loyola tuition.
St. Patty's Weekend
Since the passing of John Paul II, the new kid on the block's made more than one comment/decision that's built up something of an air of infamy. But when it comes to St. Patty's Day we're not about to argue with Benny the Hammer. St. Patty's is during Holy Week this year? No problem, says the Pope, let's move it. So this year St. Patrick's Day turned into St. Patrick's Weekend. The only way that could make the holiday better would be if we had classes off for the day…better make that the day after.
eJustice
If you're at all socially justice oriented, you've probably heard the buzz about shady dealings and sweatshop workers surrounding places like Old Navy and the Gap (let's not get started on the whole the "Red" thing, good plan Bono, bad execution). But what's an upper middle class all-American kid with a conscience to do? Turn to the Internet. Duh. Keep an eye out for eBay and World of Good's up-and-coming fair trade marketplace that will allow social justice fans and eco-friendly shoppers to patronize the third world from the comfort of their dorm rooms.
Thumbs Down
Pee As You Go
Why is it that a high enough BAC seems to give people the ability to ignore every bodily necessity but the one to urinate copiously and in public places? Seriously, girls can head for the bar in the dead of winter with all their goodies hanging out of the jar, basically staring hypothermia in the face and saying, "I dare you," but a little pressure on the old bladder and suddenly it's pop a squat or die? And guys get a little booze in the blood and, what, resort to marking Seton Court as their territory? To all the pee-pee bandits out there, keep it in your pants -- 40 grand a year is too much for us to be paying to live in a public toilet.
Going All Night
Even with fours years of experience we were yet again surprised after seeing the rather significant chunk of the Loyola student body who turned out for Relay for Life that nothing was on tap. Instead, the draws of Relay 2008 included melodious offerings by campus talents (where do these wonderful warblers come from? Must be something in the Aquafina), a gut-busting improv show and hourly influxes of free food. So even though Relay had to go up against York Road and St. Patrick's Day this year, cancer took a $150,000 dive -- that's quite a lot of medical supplies or one Loyola tuition.
St. Patty's Weekend
Since the passing of John Paul II, the new kid on the block's made more than one comment/decision that's built up something of an air of infamy. But when it comes to St. Patty's Day we're not about to argue with Benny the Hammer. St. Patty's is during Holy Week this year? No problem, says the Pope, let's move it. So this year St. Patrick's Day turned into St. Patrick's Weekend. The only way that could make the holiday better would be if we had classes off for the day…better make that the day after.
eJustice
If you're at all socially justice oriented, you've probably heard the buzz about shady dealings and sweatshop workers surrounding places like Old Navy and the Gap (let's not get started on the whole the "Red" thing, good plan Bono, bad execution). But what's an upper middle class all-American kid with a conscience to do? Turn to the Internet. Duh. Keep an eye out for eBay and World of Good's up-and-coming fair trade marketplace that will allow social justice fans and eco-friendly shoppers to patronize the third world from the comfort of their dorm rooms.
Thumbs Down
Pee As You Go
Why is it that a high enough BAC seems to give people the ability to ignore every bodily necessity but the one to urinate copiously and in public places? Seriously, girls can head for the bar in the dead of winter with all their goodies hanging out of the jar, basically staring hypothermia in the face and saying, "I dare you," but a little pressure on the old bladder and suddenly it's pop a squat or die? And guys get a little booze in the blood and, what, resort to marking Seton Court as their territory? To all the pee-pee bandits out there, keep it in your pants -- 40 grand a year is too much for us to be paying to live in a public toilet.
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